When Did You Last Have a Proper Laugh?
Making room for humour, shared jokes and the people who bring out your playful side.
There are people who can make you laugh with a glance, stories that become impossible to finish and familiar television scenes that still catch you out. During a busy week, these pleasures can get surprisingly little space. Remembering what makes you laugh, and who you enjoy laughing with, offers a welcome starting point for planning some enjoyable time.
10 Top Tips for Having a Proper Laugh
- Remember your last good laugh. Think about the company, setting and circumstances, then consider which part you could enjoy again.
- Contact someone who makes you laugh easily. Arrange a catch-up with enough time for the conversation to wander.
- Choose comedy you already enjoy. Revisit a favourite programme, funny book or performer without feeling obliged to find something new.
- Watch something together. A shared episode or film gives you the chance to enjoy each other’s reactions as well as the comedy.
- Try a playful activity. A drawing game, charades or a friendly round of crazy golf can provide plenty of unexpected moments.
- Share something with a particular person in mind. Send the clip or observation that reminded you of their sense of humour.
- Leave a little time after the practical conversation. Once the arrangements are settled, stay for the stories and digressions.
- Revisit an affectionate memory. An old photograph or familiar anecdote may bring back the amusement you shared at the time.
- Pay attention to everyone’s response. Choose humour people can enjoy comfortably, and move on when a joke lands badly.
- Put one enjoyable plan in the diary. Choose the company or activity that appeals, and let the laughter arrive in its own time.
The story nobody can finish
Someone begins telling a story you have all heard before. They reach the same troublesome detail, start laughing and lose the ability to explain it. Another person attempts to help, which makes things considerably worse.
Later, describing the incident to somebody who was absent proves hopeless. The words seem ordinary. You have to explain the expression, the timing and the way someone said a completely unremarkable thing.
Much of the pleasure belongs to being there together.
It is easy to think of humour mainly in terms of funny people and good jokes. In everyday company, a shared history can do much of the work. You recognise the reference, remember the original mishap or know exactly why a friend is trying to keep a straight face.
Research by psychologists Laura Kurtz and Sara Algoe explored shared laughter through online and laboratory studies. Their findings supported a role for laughing together in positive relationship experiences, with feeling similar to the other person emerging as a consistent explanation.
You may recognise that feeling when you meet somebody new and discover that the same small absurdity amuses you both. Conversation suddenly has something enjoyable to return to.
Who brings out this side of you? Talk to Coach Max about the people and situations in which you feel relaxed and playful. Consider whether there is someone you would enjoy spending more time with.
Giving enjoyment a place in the week
A week can contain plenty of contact with other people while offering few chances to enjoy their company. Messages concern collection times, meetings, shopping and the whereabouts of an item everybody remembers seeing somewhere.
Practical conversations have a way of filling the available space. Sometimes a catch-up needs another twenty minutes before anyone moves beyond the business of the day.
An unhurried lunch, a walk with a friend or time together after dinner can allow that conversation to develop. You might hear about something ridiculous that happened at work, revisit a family story or discover that everyone has a surprisingly strong opinion about the same minor inconvenience.
There is also pleasure in choosing comedy deliberately. A favourite episode may be an appealing way to spend half an hour. A funny audiobook can keep you company while you cook. An evening watching a comedian gives you something to look forward to.
Taste is personal. Dry observation, wordplay, physical comedy and glorious nonsense all have their audiences. Start with what you enjoy, including the familiar material that still makes you laugh when you know exactly what is coming.
What the research can tell us
A 2023 review brought together eight studies involving 315 adults to examine laughter-inducing activities and cortisol, a hormone involved in the stress response. Activities included watching comedy and taking part in guided laughter sessions. Overall, the researchers found greater reductions in cortisol than in the comparison groups.
The studies were small, their methods varied and the evidence was rated moderate to low in quality. The findings concern a biological measure of stress; longer-term health effects remain uncertain.
Laughter may nevertheless be a welcome part of an ordinary afternoon. You might notice that a funny conversation leaves you feeling more at ease, or that sharing a familiar comedy gives an otherwise uneventful evening something enjoyable to remember.
Humour also needs to suit the moment. When somebody wants to talk seriously, giving them your attention is a kind response. There will be other opportunities for jokes, and quieter days can be allowed to remain quiet.
What would you enjoy this evening? Explore a few possibilities with Coach Max, drawing on your own tastes and available time. Perhaps there is a programme you have been meaning to watch or a friend you would like to call.
Being willing to look a little ridiculous
Playful activities can create their own entertainment. A drawing game produces sketches whose resemblance to the intended subject requires a generous imagination. Charades reveals previously unknown acting ambitions. A friendly game becomes memorable because somebody attempts something spectacularly beyond their abilities.
Choose an activity where people feel comfortable joining in. Keep the rules manageable and the competition friendly enough that mistakes remain enjoyable. Being able to laugh at your own unsuccessful attempt can make it easier to have another go.
The same ease can develop during ordinary activities. Cooking together, walking the dog or getting ready for an outing may offer moments of amusement that nobody could have arranged in advance. Allow a conversation to follow them when you have the time.
There is no requirement to become the entertainer. Listening with interest, appreciating someone else’s humour and being willing to join in are all ways to enjoy the company.
What could you make room for this week? Talk to Coach Max about one enjoyable plan that fits your week. Choose something you would look forward to, with people whose company you like.
Perhaps an old friend has already come to mind while you have been reading. You can probably hear their laugh and remember a story that would set them off again. Suggest a coffee, a walk or an evening together, and give yourselves time to hear what has happened since you last met.